I was just sharing this song with a friend and thought I would add it here. This song has been a major part of my life--an encouragement and an inspiration. Enjoy!
Trust His Heart
Written by: Babbie Mason and Eddie Carswell
All things work for our good,
though sometimes we can't see how they could.
Struggles that break our hearts in two,
sometimes blind us to the truth.
Our Father knows whats best for us;
His ways are not our own.
So, when your pathway grows dim,
and you just cant see Him,
Remember Hes still on the throne.
God is too wise to be mistaken.
God is too good to be unkind.
So when you dont understand,
when you dont see His plan,
When you cant trace His hand, trust His heart.
He sees the Master plan.
He holds the future in His hands.
So don't live as those who have no hope.
All our hope is found in Him.
We walk in present knowledge,
but He sees the first and the last.
And like a tapestry,
He's weaving you and me
to someday be just like Him.
God is too wise to be mistaken.
God is too good to be unkind.
So when you dont understand,
when you dont see His plan,
When you cant trace His hand, trust His heart.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Thursday, November 13, 2008
NL and his walker!
In one clip, you can see NL learning to walk, MJ & NL having "a conversation", NL waving and MJ signing to his brother as well as lots of smiles from both! Welcome to a typical evening in the Waldren home!
Monday, November 3, 2008
Light at the end of the tunnel...
So, let's try this again. I had written some and then the internet reset and wiped all my hard work out. Anyway, I was just chatting with a friend from Joplin who possess one of those very encouraging spirits! So maybe this time around, my post will sound more up-beat!
We have bought our tickets and are headed "home". (Home just doesn't sound right...we are in that odd place where we've been away long enough to not really have a home in the US, except for wherever family is, but not here long enough to really feel like this is our home.) Well, last week I was asked a question that really through me for a loop. Normally, we try to blend in, and do an okay job of it, but as soon as we open our mouths every one within ear-shot knows we are foreigners. Then, come the usual tide of curious questions. Where are you from? Do you have family here? What are you doing here? and then inevitably, "So, which is better, Russia or America?" After almost a year and half, we've pretty much learned how to answer this..."As with any culture or country, each has their strengths and each their weakness..." After which, time permitting, they will usually want us to tell them what is better in Russia... BUT, last week the questions took a turn i didn't expect! I've been going to this MAGNIT (minimarket) close to where I teach, and have begun to get acquainted with some of the ladies there. One of them last week asked me instead, "Where is it easier to live?" I scrambled for a truthful yet culturally acceptable answer, but in a moments notice could come up with nothing, but my gut reaction... "V amerike" (in america). To which I quickly added, that easier, didn't mean better and tried in my broken Russian to explain, but customers arrived and I left feeling like I hadn't done the best job of answering. But over the last few days, as I have pondered this question, I really haven't come up with an answer that they would understand. Honestly, I still believe that living here has its benefits for our family, but at the moment none that to them would seem worthy of the difficulty of living here! Because truth is life here is hard. It is hard for them and definitely hard for us. We live in a country that doesn't really want us, where we are constantly in a state of change, where the daily chores of life are much more difficult without the conveniences common to the American life--a car, cheap stores, a drier, and for us understanding what is going on around us! So, even if it were possible to explain all this to them without offending them, the questions that would follow they wouldn't understand the answers to... "So, why are we here?" Truly and honestly, we are here because we believe that Christ has called us here, because we love Him, because He saved us, because He loves them, because He want to call them His own... How can we begin to explain these things to them in our broken Russian? In the 5-10 min window we may get? I'm still pondering... Any thoughts?!
We have bought our tickets and are headed "home". (Home just doesn't sound right...we are in that odd place where we've been away long enough to not really have a home in the US, except for wherever family is, but not here long enough to really feel like this is our home.) Well, last week I was asked a question that really through me for a loop. Normally, we try to blend in, and do an okay job of it, but as soon as we open our mouths every one within ear-shot knows we are foreigners. Then, come the usual tide of curious questions. Where are you from? Do you have family here? What are you doing here? and then inevitably, "So, which is better, Russia or America?" After almost a year and half, we've pretty much learned how to answer this..."As with any culture or country, each has their strengths and each their weakness..." After which, time permitting, they will usually want us to tell them what is better in Russia... BUT, last week the questions took a turn i didn't expect! I've been going to this MAGNIT (minimarket) close to where I teach, and have begun to get acquainted with some of the ladies there. One of them last week asked me instead, "Where is it easier to live?" I scrambled for a truthful yet culturally acceptable answer, but in a moments notice could come up with nothing, but my gut reaction... "V amerike" (in america). To which I quickly added, that easier, didn't mean better and tried in my broken Russian to explain, but customers arrived and I left feeling like I hadn't done the best job of answering. But over the last few days, as I have pondered this question, I really haven't come up with an answer that they would understand. Honestly, I still believe that living here has its benefits for our family, but at the moment none that to them would seem worthy of the difficulty of living here! Because truth is life here is hard. It is hard for them and definitely hard for us. We live in a country that doesn't really want us, where we are constantly in a state of change, where the daily chores of life are much more difficult without the conveniences common to the American life--a car, cheap stores, a drier, and for us understanding what is going on around us! So, even if it were possible to explain all this to them without offending them, the questions that would follow they wouldn't understand the answers to... "So, why are we here?" Truly and honestly, we are here because we believe that Christ has called us here, because we love Him, because He saved us, because He loves them, because He want to call them His own... How can we begin to explain these things to them in our broken Russian? In the 5-10 min window we may get? I'm still pondering... Any thoughts?!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Fall Pics of the Boys
Here's some of my more recent favorite pics of my little boys!
"Here, you try..."
We had our teachers over for Fondue. 
Strolling on Krasnaya
...I mean running...
Oh, look who daddy caught!
They had a blast at this little park we found about a 20 min tram ride from our house.
NL was all smiles on this little sea-saw.
Then again, he's my smilely-baby!
MJ enjoyed climbing around. It was a super nice day!
Becoming a climbing enthusiast like his father!
So hard for mama to get a pic w/ her kiddos...that she likes that is! ;-)
Enjoying their early Christmas present! I picked it up at a garage sale for less than $12 and they play with it every day!
Possing for visa photos...he was all smiles, but not exactly what we needed!
He got himself in his toy bucket!
Nightly routine with papa.
They did this when mommy was not around...
I think Daddy was folding clothes when MJ's underwear became their hats!
our little kitchen helpers!
This is the sweetest little girl you could ever meet! And NL just loved every minute with her!
He loves playing peek-a-boo!
My little monkey!
Mommy, look who I found!
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We were trying to learn how to blow bubbles at the Botanical Gardens when he decided he'd like to taste it... "surely something so fun, must taste so good...?"
"Circles, mama, run in circles?"
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MJ has a pillow fettish!
Hope you've enjoyed my valient attempt at cutting these down to a mere few! If you are interested in seeing some more... here's the link http://picasaweb.google.ru/jen4him/Fall08#
Sunday, September 28, 2008
A Day for Reminiscing
Today I was reminded of a turning point in my life. A time that that I remember with pain and joy. A time of crisis. A time of change. A time when He drew me close. I wrote two poems during that time. The first "Deep Inside of Me" is a bit depressing, but it was brutally honest at the time and began my search for answers and the second was written as He guided me through this time. I love to go back and read them and remember the mourning that He turned into Dancing.
Deep Inside of Me
So tender and easily wounded,
Yet so protected around,
My heart is locked…
I readily hear, but don’t readily share.
I readily laugh, but don’t readily care.
I readily ask, but don’t readily answer.
I readily see, but I’m not an observer.
A facad is all that people see.
They don’t know that’s not the true me.
But those that are close know the truth,
I’ve been insecure all my youth.
My heart is locked up so secure
That it is not easily touched for sure.
The walls are built day by day;
Inside them weeping my heart does lay.
The sun doesn’t shine on all my scars.
It’s so protected by all the bars.
Am I only cold and uncaring?
Or is it just from despairing?
I laugh and I cry,
I giggle and sigh,
But all that I live is a lie.
I can’t hide from the truth of “good-bye.”
They say changes come through the years;
And moments are missed ‘cause of fears,
But what do I do being tender inside? How long from the future can I hide?
Broken
I was happy. I was content.
My days with activities were spent.
I was busy, so busy serving You;
I had no time for what was true.
I tried to ignore what I knew was true.
My soul was yearning, yearning for more of You.
I longed to see Your holy face;
And feel around me Your embrace.
I strained and struggled;
I worked harder and harder,
But finally drained, I looked to You;
For crying out was all I could do.
Now, I know His will
And He’s so real,
My life He seeks to fill.
I’m so weak, but You’re so strong.
In my silence, You gave me a song.
I need so much, You’re so much more.
You saw right through me—right to my core.
My door was locked, but You had the key.
So, here I am where I should be.
I’m here down on my knees…
Begging God, “Please, use me!”
Take me, break me, mold me, use me,
Make me nothing, ‘till You’re all I need.
I know I’m in the right place,
But I stand only by Your grace.
My future unclear,
But You are near.
The sky was clouded;
For rain I prayed
To come and drench me,
Refresh and cleanse me,
Renew Your spirit with in me.
Like the clouded sky I see,
Which brings refreshing rain from Thee,
So my future dark and clouded,
Brings my life closer to thee.
In my fear, I must rely
Wholly, completely on You.
To do Your will is my desire,
To walk with You even through fire.
I’m here for a purpose—Yours;
To serve my Lord of Lords.
May I forever be totally, fully committed to Thee.
So, Take me, break me, mold me, and use me.
Deep Inside of Me
So tender and easily wounded,
Yet so protected around,
My heart is locked…
I readily hear, but don’t readily share.
I readily laugh, but don’t readily care.
I readily ask, but don’t readily answer.
I readily see, but I’m not an observer.
A facad is all that people see.
They don’t know that’s not the true me.
But those that are close know the truth,
I’ve been insecure all my youth.
My heart is locked up so secure
That it is not easily touched for sure.
The walls are built day by day;
Inside them weeping my heart does lay.
The sun doesn’t shine on all my scars.
It’s so protected by all the bars.
Am I only cold and uncaring?
Or is it just from despairing?
I laugh and I cry,
I giggle and sigh,
But all that I live is a lie.
I can’t hide from the truth of “good-bye.”
They say changes come through the years;
And moments are missed ‘cause of fears,
But what do I do being tender inside? How long from the future can I hide?
Broken
I was happy. I was content.
My days with activities were spent.
I was busy, so busy serving You;
I had no time for what was true.
I tried to ignore what I knew was true.
My soul was yearning, yearning for more of You.
I longed to see Your holy face;
And feel around me Your embrace.
I strained and struggled;
I worked harder and harder,
But finally drained, I looked to You;
For crying out was all I could do.
Now, I know His will
And He’s so real,
My life He seeks to fill.
I’m so weak, but You’re so strong.
In my silence, You gave me a song.
I need so much, You’re so much more.
You saw right through me—right to my core.
My door was locked, but You had the key.
So, here I am where I should be.
I’m here down on my knees…
Begging God, “Please, use me!”
Take me, break me, mold me, use me,
Make me nothing, ‘till You’re all I need.
I know I’m in the right place,
But I stand only by Your grace.
My future unclear,
But You are near.
The sky was clouded;
For rain I prayed
To come and drench me,
Refresh and cleanse me,
Renew Your spirit with in me.
Like the clouded sky I see,
Which brings refreshing rain from Thee,
So my future dark and clouded,
Brings my life closer to thee.
In my fear, I must rely
Wholly, completely on You.
To do Your will is my desire,
To walk with You even through fire.
I’m here for a purpose—Yours;
To serve my Lord of Lords.
May I forever be totally, fully committed to Thee.
So, Take me, break me, mold me, and use me.
Background to the "Metaphor"
I was talking the other day to one of the other M's here and thought about this poem i wrote when I was in Melilla--it's a little Spanish city on the coast of Morrocco where I interned under some M's who were working on the hard soil there...that summer they had their first meeting together...it was such a joyous occasion! I've since edited it a bit and left some words out that need not be googled! :-) I hope it's an encouragement to others as it was to me.
Jen
Jen
Metaphor in Creation
I sit here on the sea shore—staring at the sand.
The waves keep rolling in, one by one they hit the land.
Each one smoothing out the sand.
My eyes catch sight of a sea shell, and then I see the wave.
It falls upon and over it, but when the waters ebb…
The shell has remained intact.
One by one the waves roll in, but the shell remains unmoved.
Yet what my eyes do not detect from where I sit is that—
Each wave loosens the sand around this shell until—
There comes a certain wave.
This wave is not special in any form or way—it is not big nor small.
It has no special power or force to claim at all.
But when that wave hits the land and comes back in again…
Low, the shell has gone with it.
These prose pop in my head and then, I see,
It is another metaphor, maybe heaven sent.
For around me lies a nation…whose hearts seem hard as stones.
The M*sl-m world enslaves them…their heart and mind and soul.
They seem so stuck, unmovable…as each M--ry's life is spent.
Each one returns with seemingly little to show.
But, unseen to their eyes is this…the ground around is weakening
As each person comes and goes.
Flowing God’s love and power over those who would be His own.
Who knows when the shell will loose?
But, oh, the trap!
To think that the one that brings the shell with it is special on it’s own.
For, the work was done by many who carried the load before.
And they all have One in common—the power of the Lord.
The result is not our own goal,
But to do and be the best—with who we are in Him
To be who God intended and do what He has planned.
At the end of times, we may celebrate…
That though many “waves” came and went—
The “shell” at last came in.
The waves keep rolling in, one by one they hit the land.
Each one smoothing out the sand.
My eyes catch sight of a sea shell, and then I see the wave.
It falls upon and over it, but when the waters ebb…
The shell has remained intact.
One by one the waves roll in, but the shell remains unmoved.
Yet what my eyes do not detect from where I sit is that—
Each wave loosens the sand around this shell until—
There comes a certain wave.
This wave is not special in any form or way—it is not big nor small.
It has no special power or force to claim at all.
But when that wave hits the land and comes back in again…
Low, the shell has gone with it.
These prose pop in my head and then, I see,
It is another metaphor, maybe heaven sent.
For around me lies a nation…whose hearts seem hard as stones.
The M*sl-m world enslaves them…their heart and mind and soul.
They seem so stuck, unmovable…as each M--ry's life is spent.
Each one returns with seemingly little to show.
But, unseen to their eyes is this…the ground around is weakening
As each person comes and goes.
Flowing God’s love and power over those who would be His own.
Who knows when the shell will loose?
But, oh, the trap!
To think that the one that brings the shell with it is special on it’s own.
For, the work was done by many who carried the load before.
And they all have One in common—the power of the Lord.
The result is not our own goal,
But to do and be the best—with who we are in Him
To be who God intended and do what He has planned.
At the end of times, we may celebrate…
That though many “waves” came and went—
The “shell” at last came in.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Scattered, random, and etc...
So, one week down and 11 more to go! I can't say that I don't like teaching because the truth of the matter is I really do. What's not to love... social time, conversation, language, grammar, and best of all, a captive audience?! :-) Oh.., I know.., the prep time and the time it takes me away from my boys...that's what I don't love. [Or should I say, "I'm not loving..." Use that rare progressive form with a stative verb to show emphasis!!! :-) --Can you tell what I've been up to this week?!] Anyway, I'm definitely pulled there, but life is what it is right now and I continue to live and learn.
I figured out this week that public transportation, though quite accessible to us living downtown, only gets me to my destination at most twice as fast as just walking... How might you ask did I figure this tidbit out? Well, thanks to some bicycle racing that took place in the city, our main tram line was shutdown and a lot of the buses changed their route. And to add to the caos all traffic was almost at a stand still on our main street, so instead of the 20-30 minute trec home, I walked home and it took less than an hour! It's a weird feeling to be walking faster than traffic. Even the sidewalks where congested with people!!
Then there's the daily walk to the school where I teach. Most of the time I just choose to walk since it only takes 15-20 minutes. I could take the tram that passes a block away from our house but even if there is no wait at either stop (school is one stop east, switch trams, and then 2 stops north) it still takes 15-20 minutes! Go figure! So, maybe soon i'll be in pretty good shape...I figured out that most school days I walk about an hour!
Moving on to the weekend. Andy ran the local 5k run and the whole family had fun. My language helper joined us as we watched around 2000 people take off running down Krasnaya (our main downtown strip--like a "Main St.") Then less than 15 minutes later, we saw the first runners return--they said they were Olympians!! While I think Andy enjoyed his run, I was once again caught off guard by the fact that races are not a simply a spectator sport. When he did his marathon, I remember also getting a 4 hour workout walking back and forth to different spots. Well, this being a short race and having two kids with me, I figured I was safe. I walked the 15 minutes to Krasnaya from the house but when Michael John saw all the people running, he decided to join in. Thankfully, Vika was their to help me. She stayed with Nathanael while I let MJ run up and down one of the blocks while we waited for Andy to came back around!! MJ ran almost 4 blocks!!!! Needless to say he took a great nap that afternoon!!! :-) I'll try and see if I can get some video of it. He was so cute!
Well, I need to get to doing some homework and preparring my lesson for tomorrow, so off I go!
I figured out this week that public transportation, though quite accessible to us living downtown, only gets me to my destination at most twice as fast as just walking... How might you ask did I figure this tidbit out? Well, thanks to some bicycle racing that took place in the city, our main tram line was shutdown and a lot of the buses changed their route. And to add to the caos all traffic was almost at a stand still on our main street, so instead of the 20-30 minute trec home, I walked home and it took less than an hour! It's a weird feeling to be walking faster than traffic. Even the sidewalks where congested with people!!
Then there's the daily walk to the school where I teach. Most of the time I just choose to walk since it only takes 15-20 minutes. I could take the tram that passes a block away from our house but even if there is no wait at either stop (school is one stop east, switch trams, and then 2 stops north) it still takes 15-20 minutes! Go figure! So, maybe soon i'll be in pretty good shape...I figured out that most school days I walk about an hour!
Moving on to the weekend. Andy ran the local 5k run and the whole family had fun. My language helper joined us as we watched around 2000 people take off running down Krasnaya (our main downtown strip--like a "Main St.") Then less than 15 minutes later, we saw the first runners return--they said they were Olympians!! While I think Andy enjoyed his run, I was once again caught off guard by the fact that races are not a simply a spectator sport. When he did his marathon, I remember also getting a 4 hour workout walking back and forth to different spots. Well, this being a short race and having two kids with me, I figured I was safe. I walked the 15 minutes to Krasnaya from the house but when Michael John saw all the people running, he decided to join in. Thankfully, Vika was their to help me. She stayed with Nathanael while I let MJ run up and down one of the blocks while we waited for Andy to came back around!! MJ ran almost 4 blocks!!!! Needless to say he took a great nap that afternoon!!! :-) I'll try and see if I can get some video of it. He was so cute!
Well, I need to get to doing some homework and preparring my lesson for tomorrow, so off I go!
Sunday, August 31, 2008
What I did this summer...
Well, since I'm in School and will soon be teaching as well, it seems only proper to fulfill the timeless after summer project... So, here is what I did this summer.
Humbling...that about sums up my summer! I suppose there was a lot of change, but change seems to be a constant in my life so that wasn't out of the ordinary. What was extra-ordinary was the rethinking of some of my presuppositions and misconceptions, primarily about mother-hood and ministry.
So this summer started off with a crash...literally. As I sat in the back of our teamates car, holding my two screaming children, all I could think about was getting them out of the car to safety. And thus began our summer. Andy did a lot of running around trying to take care of the the wrecked car and getting it sold and all that entailed. It tooke literally all summer, but we praise God that our family was fine.
About a week later another process began... our teamates began considering the possibility of returning to the US for further education...a process that at first strained but ultimately stregthened our team more than we could have ever imagined!! The result of our prayers and seeking resulted in a descision being made a few weeks later and a month later we we were stashing their belongings in any nook and crany we could find in our apt as they headed back to the States. When it rains it pours!!
We were very sad to see them go, but we believe in their decision and look fwd to working with them again in a year or so! As a side note, Jason was teaching classes at a local school not far from our home and so, starting in a week, I will be taking over one of his classes--a late evening class. It starts on Mon and will last for 12 weeks, five days a week for an 1 1/2 each night. Whew! I'm getting overwhelmed just think about it, along with my language learning and being a wife and a mother.... which brings me back around to the main point...
While this made the summer interesting, all of this has just been the back-drop to a lot of my soul-searching. In May, things with my eldest had me at my wits-in. I love the little munchkin, and my parents constantly remind me that most of his quirks were mine at that age, but how to mold that little strong-willed child without breaking his spirit was beyond me... until a my teamate lent me a great set of books, "To train up a child" (www.nogreaterjoy.org). They're principles and outlook have been very refreshing to my stagnet parenting. My education and experience have made me a skeptic, and while I don't agree with everything they say, they have given me lot to think about and renewed my spirit and refocused my goals in parenting. But before I could even begin to change my tactics, I had to take the hardest step of all, swallowing my pride and realizing I need some help and then accepting the humbling that came with realizing how so many of my tactics were misguided and ineffective. That was hard. It stung, but I kept reminding myself that my love for my children could leave no room for pride. And so I was humbled and began to renew my efforts to train my children to become the godly men I know my Lord desires.
That humbling over the last few weeks has become a joy to me. They have become a joy to me. It is so hard for me to be consistent and joyful in my training of them, but I pray that He will strengthen me and give me wisdom, because their souls are precious and eternal, but my time with my little ones is not!! They will grow so quickly and I must redeem the time I have with them! So, this summer I was humbled, it was bitter, but it's become a joy!
Humbling...that about sums up my summer! I suppose there was a lot of change, but change seems to be a constant in my life so that wasn't out of the ordinary. What was extra-ordinary was the rethinking of some of my presuppositions and misconceptions, primarily about mother-hood and ministry.
So this summer started off with a crash...literally. As I sat in the back of our teamates car, holding my two screaming children, all I could think about was getting them out of the car to safety. And thus began our summer. Andy did a lot of running around trying to take care of the the wrecked car and getting it sold and all that entailed. It tooke literally all summer, but we praise God that our family was fine.
About a week later another process began... our teamates began considering the possibility of returning to the US for further education...a process that at first strained but ultimately stregthened our team more than we could have ever imagined!! The result of our prayers and seeking resulted in a descision being made a few weeks later and a month later we we were stashing their belongings in any nook and crany we could find in our apt as they headed back to the States. When it rains it pours!!
We were very sad to see them go, but we believe in their decision and look fwd to working with them again in a year or so! As a side note, Jason was teaching classes at a local school not far from our home and so, starting in a week, I will be taking over one of his classes--a late evening class. It starts on Mon and will last for 12 weeks, five days a week for an 1 1/2 each night. Whew! I'm getting overwhelmed just think about it, along with my language learning and being a wife and a mother.... which brings me back around to the main point...
While this made the summer interesting, all of this has just been the back-drop to a lot of my soul-searching. In May, things with my eldest had me at my wits-in. I love the little munchkin, and my parents constantly remind me that most of his quirks were mine at that age, but how to mold that little strong-willed child without breaking his spirit was beyond me... until a my teamate lent me a great set of books, "To train up a child" (www.nogreaterjoy.org). They're principles and outlook have been very refreshing to my stagnet parenting. My education and experience have made me a skeptic, and while I don't agree with everything they say, they have given me lot to think about and renewed my spirit and refocused my goals in parenting. But before I could even begin to change my tactics, I had to take the hardest step of all, swallowing my pride and realizing I need some help and then accepting the humbling that came with realizing how so many of my tactics were misguided and ineffective. That was hard. It stung, but I kept reminding myself that my love for my children could leave no room for pride. And so I was humbled and began to renew my efforts to train my children to become the godly men I know my Lord desires.
That humbling over the last few weeks has become a joy to me. They have become a joy to me. It is so hard for me to be consistent and joyful in my training of them, but I pray that He will strengthen me and give me wisdom, because their souls are precious and eternal, but my time with my little ones is not!! They will grow so quickly and I must redeem the time I have with them! So, this summer I was humbled, it was bitter, but it's become a joy!
Friday, May 30, 2008
In Spite of the Butterflies
My heart’s racing…can I really do this? I’ve been thinking about it for weeks… I think I can, but… what if…, so many things could go wrong…, but if it works…The feeling is all too familiar… the same feeling I have every time I try a new roller-coaster, embark on a new journey, visit a new place. I remember feeling this way when I mustered up the courage to jump off a 30-foot cliff into the crystal clear waters of the Mediterranean Sea in Morocco in 2002. The same feeling I had when I boarded the plane the first time I flew internationally by myself at the age of 17… butterflies in my stomach flittering up to my throat.I have thought and planned and tried to consider every possibility and scenario. At last the time has come. What do I have to lose? Well, a lot, but there is much to gain…freedom and the satisfaction of having accomplished such a monumental task. So, what did I do today? I gathered up my two children and went to visit our teammates. What?!?!?You may think that sounds easy, but let me shed a little light on the subject. We don’t have a car, so that meant I got the two boys ready, tried to pack a “light”, but fully equipped diaper bag, put on the baby front pack so I could “carry” Nathanael, but still have my hands free just in case. I then had Michael John wear his “Monkey” (a nice little backpack with a tail for Mommy to hold). I made sure they were both properly attired to suit the Russian taste. Too little or too many layers and I would be sure to get an earful from one of the dear old ladies out and about. After giving MJ a serious talking-to about where we were going, how we would get there and the importance of his cooperation, we headed out.I held on tightly to MJ as we walked the 5 minutes to the tram stop. He walked the whole way without fussing. Then we sat and waited for a tram to come. It wasn’t long before we saw one, and I made sure to give MJ the heads-up about how we would have to enter it. The doors only open for a short time, and there is a very high first step followed by two slightly shorter steps, and we would have to try and find a seat or hope someone sees us quickly and gives up their seat for us to sit and get set in the 45 seconds that the tram spends at most stops.Ready, set, go! “Step up, MJ!” I half drag him aboard. “Yes,” a seat by the door. “Oh, and one across…I think I can handle this…” Now, I just have to hold on to MJ with one hand while searching for my pass and situating our bag so it’s not in anyone’s way… “Breath, we’re on…” So far so good, no one seems upset by my youngest being in a pack and my eldest being in a harness…if anything, I think I see some sympathetic looks.Three stops later, “MJ, we are going to get off now. I need you to hold Mommy’s hand as we get down.” Again, he cooperates as he half climbs, half stumbles down the stairs. “Ok, one down, one to go!” We walk around the corner to our other stop and wait…and wait. “Oh, I see one… Dear God, please let it be a number 6 or 10… Sorry, MJ, that’s a bus but it’s not the number we need…” MJ is getting restless… “Finally, there’s a 6... oh great, it’s packed. Here we go… hold Mommy’s hand.” Stumble, stumble, drag, squeeze. Good, someone got up near the door, but I really need 2 seats. Oh, another person’s getting up…” Well, that didn’t work out. I tried to say in Russian that I had to sit together with MJ, but several people started to say things as one of them tries to show me that they will hold on to him, while I take a seat in another row. At this MJ screams, so I quickly sat down (more like leaned on the seat as most of me was in the aisle!) and get MJ calmed down so we can ride the bulk of trip in this terribly hot, packed trolley-bus.Well, the good thing is, both kids are not underdressed and some of the adults standing around us seem to be amused and are amusing MJ. That helps! I look down to check on Nathanael who has snuggled in and somehow managed to fall asleep amidst the chaos. What a picture of tranquility. I kiss his cheek as I search for MJ’s sippy cup--one of my tactics for keeping my 2-year-old occupied in situations that I know he dislikes… (Smile). He’s still so American in his desire to have his own space!Twenty minutes later, it’s time to get off. We manage to get down a little more smoothly this time…we just might get the hang of this! Now for the last leg, another 5-minute walk to their house. At this point, MJ wants to be held, but with the constant reminder that up ahead he will get to see his friends, he perseveres. (He doesn’t really have much of choice, since his mommy already has her hands full!!)(Sigh of relief) We are here and can play, rest, and fellowship for a couple of hours before we try that again. We had a very pleasant visit, and two hours later I gathered up the courage to trek out again. This time our friend carried MJ to the bus stop which was perfect considering it was late and he was getting tired. We got perfect seats on this half-filled bus after only a few minutes of waiting. It was nice.“What?!” The driver rattles something off in Russian… next stop, he says it again and this time I catch it, the bus isn’t following its usual route. Okay, well, I have about 10 minutes to figure out how to get these two boys home once the bus stops. It’s a good thing MJ was carried because now he has to walk an extra block and a half to find another tram stop. Bless his heart, he’s done wonderfully and with the promise of another sippy cup and crackers, we make it to the stop, sit and end up waiting for a while.The boys are peaceful, but it’s getting late and the wind has picked up. I keep glancing, straining to see if a tram is coming all the while trying to keep MJ entertained. “Yea, there it is. Ok, MJ, we are going to get on the tram so we can go home and see Daddy.” We get on, not so smoothly this time, but the tram is packed. As it begins to move, someone notices us and gets up so we can squeeze in to a little seat--big momma, big brother and little baby, plus bag! But we are in, several stops later it’s time to try and squeeze off, but again, not so smoothly. “Moshna, moshna”, I try and say, and finally they glance my way and see the kiddos. A guy backs off the tram and helps MJ down! “We’ve made it!!!” Well, not quite, but we only have a 5-minute walk and we’ll be home! We pass by the little store where Daddy often times gets 20-cent cones of ice cream and MJ says “Ice cream?” He’s been so good, but there is a line and mommy just wants to get home! “We have some at home, MJ. Let’s go get some ice cream and see Daddy!” With that, we are off.“We are home.” (Sigh) MJ did great. Nathanael did great. All in all it went well. So, am I ready to do it again sometime? Let me think about it…(hesitate)…Sure!? ..… Oh! Here come the butterflies!
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